“I’m burning myself in the hope of burning who I was.”
The Story
There is a blue sky above me which is soft, endless, and calm.
The trees rise around me like still witnesses and in the middle of it all, I am on fire.
This is not a metaphor.
This is not poetry.
This is pain. Real. Sharp. Relentless.
This is the anger I carry toward myself so fierce; I want to step outside of my body and beat it down.
But how do you escape something that is YOU?
“The Fire Within” was born from that helpless rage.
The kind of rage that is not loud but simmering. A quiet scream behind your eyes.
It is the ache of knowing how much time you have wasted, how far behind you’ve fallen, and how deeply you fear you’ll never catch up.
I hate happiness.
Once you are habitual of it, it acts like a drug. You tend to see it everywhere
chase it like a mouse who is after the cheese.
I hate it not because it is bad, but because it feels fake.
The world is beautiful too beautiful, And I do not know how to belong in it without feeling like I am rotting from the inside out.
But still I burn.
Not to end it, but to become something.
To destroy the version of me that keeps dragging me backward.
To rise from the ashes of who I used to be.
This render is not about giving up.
It is about the war I am willing to fight with myself, to keep the fire lit not to burn me down, but to forge me into something new.
Why It Exists
This piece exists for the ones who feel stuck inside themselves.
For those who are angry not at the world, but at the reflection in the mirror.
For the people who know the pain of being their own prison.
It is not a cry for help.
It’s a declaration of war.
Because sometimes, the only way out,
is through the fire.
Artist’s Note
When I made this piece, I was not okay.
I did not want to write a caption. I did not want to sleep.
I wanted to scream until something in me cracked open.
So, I made this.
The fire you see it is not just art. It is real. It is me.and maybe, it is you too.
I do not know how much longer this battle will last.
But I know one thing:
I will not lose to me.
